Two tests of love

If you are in any relationship, here are two tests for you. It doesn’t matter what kind of relationship it is. It may be between you and your spouse/you and your children/you and your friend/you and your pet/any kind of relationship you can think of.

I have tested both of them and they are liberating.

Here are they –

1. No matter who that person is, go to that person and say that – I love you, but I am not attached to you at all.

[Explanation – Love is not a synonym of attachment. Attachment simply means that your happiness depends on how the other person with whom you are in a relationship reacts in any given moment. If you feel that you are not attached to the person but love him/her so much, examine your mental peace when you both are disagreeing on something. If you are immobilized by the other person’s reactions, you are attached to that person which is not very good for your mental peace. Try detachment instead. Love that person enormously, but don’t get absorbed in how s/he reacts to any given situation :)]

Now the next one.

2. I think this is tougher than the previous one. Again, go to the person you are in a relationship with and say to him/her – I will let you be who you are. You are free to think your thoughts, take your actions, make your decisions, and be the person you want to be. I trust you and I will not come in between you and what you want to be at all in our relationship.

[Explanation – Love is letting the person feel freer than before. If you love that person (in any way), your responsibility is to trust his/her nature and let him/her follow his/her inner-compass. If you try to dictate the other person about what you want him/her to do, it is not at all love, it is an agreement. Examine your relationship with the person and ponder.]

I know I am sounding weird.

How can it be possible to be detached from your loved ones and to let your near ones decide their own paths?

But try both of them and then see how your relationship will unfold. I will not recommend that you do it for any benefit though, rather you should do it for love, because you love that person more than anything else.

I have first listened to this on one of the tapes of Dr. Wayne Dyer and these two tests are recommended by the renowned priest and authorย Anthony de Mello.

Try them.

I will step back now ๐Ÿ™‚


How to practice one tasking?

Practice doesn’t make you perfect, but it certainly makes improvements in whatever you are practicing.

And once you take up one tasking you will see your practice will magnify your craft. It certainly did for me. Though I am not perfect at all, but I practice one tasking most of the time.

Imagine the old example of trying to burn a paper with a magnifying glass. What would you need to do? You need to centralize the rays through the glass into just one small area on the paper. The smaller the concentration, easier for you to burn the paper.

Same is applicable for one tasking. Smaller the area of your focus, more is the chances of magnifying your craft.

Here’s how you can start applying one tasking in whatever you practice –

1. Throw out all the distraction – Close the internet. Stop all the pop-ups. Remove everything from where you will do the work. Close the door if required. Give yourself some room to breathe. Now you are ready to start.

2. Choose something easy to do – Choose something which seems comfortable for you. When I got started I started with writing for 5 minutes a day. Don’t worry about anything else right now. Just pick one thing which is easy for you.

3. Start super small – Start doing your craft just for 5 minutes without letting your focus strip away anywhere. Concentrate only on your creation, your movements of hands, on the paper/the material you use to create,

4. Stop if urges come – Pause if any urge comes to do something else other than your craft. Don’t get up or do something else. Rather take few deep breathes. Then start doing again.

You are done. You just practiced one tasking. How does it feel? I know it feels awesome. If you want to crystallize one tasking in your life, you need to keep on doing these 4 steps again and again until one tasking doesn’t need to be an issue for you.

One tasking is one of my best practices. And now it would be yours too ๐Ÿ™‚

If in any case, you are curious to know more about one tasking, please check out my book on One Tasking.

Namaste ๐Ÿ™‚